I received an email today from a dear friend of mine stuck in the abusive relationship that is her job. I will spare you the details or the specifics but let's just say that her boss (as well as a number of her coworkers) treat her very badly and do not value her for what she has to offer. I know we all have pluses and minuses and there are always difficult parts to our personality (I am overly emotional and 100% NOT a morning person) but my dear friend - whom I have also worked with - has a great deal to offer. Loads of experience, a charming personality, the desire to foster success in her associates, not to mention the fact that she's incredibly smart and dedicated.
Too often today we see people like this who are simply railroaded by employers who offer no support, no encouragement, and no room for betterment. Whether we are dismissed because of our sex, our age, our political leanings or just because our bosses are morons - it always sucks.
I feel for my dear friend. Her situation sucks - it just sucks! It's easy in my position to take the idealistic view - quit! Not everyone is in a position to quit. Money, family, opportunity, personality, etc. There are a lot of reasons not to quit something. For overachievers this seems especially difficult - I don't quit, I succeed!
I have a number of friends in this situation - the thankless drudgery of a job you hate that tends to hate you back. I want to give all of them the gift of The Quit. It's terrifying but quitting does give you an end to the freefall of suck that takes hold when you hate your job.
For all of you struggling in this situation... I'm here. There are tons of people struggling with you. You are not alone.
Posts
5 months ago
Yes, quit! But look for another job first. I guess I'm not as brave as you about quitting with no back-up plan. I quit a job I hated with a boss I didn't respect, but I found another job first, and it was sweet to be able to tell my boss I was moving on to a new (and better) job! It seems that the law of averages is on your side--one really bad job is almost always followed by a better one.
ReplyDeleteJennifer
While I may not be able to quit on the spot today (my daydream), there is always the sometimes delicious feeling of witholding. "You don't deserve me, so you can't have everything I have to offer." Passive? Uh-huh. Aggressive? Yes, that too. And it's only a short-term strategy, but in a dead-end situation, that might be the only thing under my control. So I am trying to focus very hard on what's next and not get caught up in any of the daily indignities.
ReplyDeleteAnd as a footnote, I do believe that courage is contagious, so thanks for the thought that we are not alone.
Signed,
The afore-mentioned Dear Friend