Review Reviewed

As you all know, I was scheduled to have my mid-intro period review yesterday (45 day review?). Surprisingly, it happened as scheduled (last job consistently canceled and rescheduled such things). The top line is that it went very well. There was tons of positive feedback and a few pieces of constructive criticism - which really were constructive and not destructive!

What I think I found most valuable was a reminder that I have a lot to offer my employer. The few things that were offered as points of possible betterment are all so clearly related to the abusive, destructive relationship I had with my last job. A year of consistently demeaning treatment really gets you down - even when you know it's not your fault.

It's only been 6 weeks but I already feel like a completely different person. I have way more energy and positivity about life in general. I'm back to my old self - eager and curious. I'm still struggling to get my confidence 100% back and I admit, I'm a bit gun-shy about some things. But having your employer say 'hey, we like what we see, give us more!' is a great reinforcement of one's confidence.

Also, just as a note - you might remember that when I first interviewed with my dream job, I had not yet quit my last one. My second interview came nearly a week after I had quit and I was past my phases of fear and sadness... and well into euphoria over quitting. In my review yesterday I mentioned this and said that I think even between those two interviews I felt like a completely different person.

Turns out, they noticed the difference too. Just serves to reinforce the fact that quitting opened possibilities for me. Before I quit, I was just a sad sack, desperate to get out.

Nobody wants that.