Time to Mourn

I know I've been comparing quitting my job to breaking up with a significant other that you once loved. I will admit, sometimes I feel a little silly posing this analogy but in truth, I'm going through a lot of the same feelings that come with leaving a relationship that is no longer beneficial. There are quite a few similarities.

I've noticed, as the post quit euphoria begins to fade, that I feel worn out and saddened by the whole situation. Sad that it didn't work out, sad that I have to leave, sad about the end of this chapter in my life. Of course, there is a good amount of excitement and happiness that comes with this next step- it's a new challenge, a new path, new opportunities, etc. But, for now, it's a very bittersweet feeling. I know 100% (okay... almost) that this is the right decision for me but I'm finding that it's important to let myself acknowledge the sadness that I'm feeling and the loss. Don't get me wrong - I'm not saying this is like losing a loved one but, it's still the loss of something that I put a lot of time, effort, and energy into, something that was a defining part of me for awhile. That is a loss and it deserves some time.

This all makes sense to me but I admit, I didn't anticipate these feelings and a part of feels like "enough already" - I want to be done with thinking about this! But it is not a clean break so time to acclimate is good. I finished my transition plan for the job today and look forward to having a hard date in mind for the end. I'm a planner and putting energy into my next steps will make me happy.

In the meantime, I'll alternate between sad and angry music as one does during the aftermath of a breakup.